Jack's relationship is strained, and Jill is having a hard time trusting him.
Jack is swamped at work, feels overwhelmed, and is burning out. To top it off, when he finally gets home from work, he feels like he can't even unwind. He has to help out with extra projects at home.
He's been so busy with everything that he's starting to forget what he agreed to do or what needs to be done--both at work and at home. Everything is piling up on him, and it's all that he can do just to get through the day.
Jill is frustrated because Jack keeps saying "Yeah, I'll take care of that." But it doesn't get done. He's not following through. She feels like she can't depend on him or trust what he says right now. The extra burden falls to her, and she's feeling stressed and hurt over his lack of integrity.
What is integrity, and how can it help?
Integrity, simply put, is following through with what we say we're going to do.
This is easier said than done. It can be hard to follow through when unexpected or overwhelming things in life come at us. It's easier to provide excuses; however, regardless of the reason, if we say we are going to do something, it could be seen as a break of integrity if we don't follow through with our word.
Having integrity builds trust. Others can depend on us, and that strengthens what we say. When we say "yes" and mean "yes" and say "no" and mean "no" and stick to that, it makes conversations easier and more straightforward. Once people learn that we will stand by our "yes," they won't have to hover over us to nitpick or make sure that we're doing the job. Similarly, if they understand that we mean "no," then they will be less likely to try to pressure or persuade us to change our minds. This adds to a sense of freedom and clarifies boundaries. It can also improve relationships because of the trust it builds.
Back to Jack...
Jack was feeling swamped, but he took a step back and realized that he needed to stand by his commitment and live with integrity. He worked on being intentional. He stopped flippantly saying "Yep" or "Sure, I'll do that." Instead, he responded with "I'll have that done in two weeks."
At first, people weren't particularly happy with that response. It seemed like he was just pushing it off until later like he had been doing before. With time, however, when Jack followed through at the time he said he would, the people around him started to notice. Jack became more organized, and people could count on him to get done what he agreed to.
Jill's stress and frustration levels decreased because she started seeing the new positive pattern with Jack following through, and she realized she could trust him.
As for Jack, his time at work and home became better. Instead of feeling like everyone was against him, living with integrity allowed for the sense that people were there to help and support him.