Magill Counseling Associates, LLC - Blog by Content by Robert Magill, edited by JoyMagill Counseling Associates, LLC - Blog by Content by Robert Magill, edited by Joyhttps://www.magillcounseling.com/blogs/author/joyTue, 17 Mar 2026 02:25:44 -0700http://zoho.com/sites/<![CDATA[Dealing with Difficult Emotions, Part 3]]>https://www.magillcounseling.com/blogs/post/Dealing-with-Difficult-Emotions-Part-3Acceptance doesn't try to eliminate or ignore the emotion. Acceptance recognizes the emotion and acknowledges the impact of it, without trying to change it.]]>

When we last checked in with Jack, he had just received an email from his boss notifying him that they were going to have a meeting at the end of the day, and he didn't know what to expect.

How can Jack manage the situation when he can't directly address the cause of the big emotion or he doesn't have the coping skills that can work in that particular situation? 

This is where acceptance comes in.

What is Acceptance?

There are times, like Jack, when we can't change the thing in our lives that's causing emotional turmoil.  We may not have the coping skills we need for the situation.  When we find ourselves with big emotions and limited tools to address them, acceptance can be extremely powerful.


What is acceptance? 


Acceptance is NOT glossing things over.  It's not saying "everything is fine" and putting on a show and a fake smile. 


Sometimes there's nothing we can do about the emotion, but it's a difficult emotion, and it can get in our way unless we recognize it's there.  Often, the more we fight or ignore it, the bigger it gets.   


Acceptance doesn't try to eliminate or ignore the emotion.  Acceptance recognizes the emotion and acknowledges the impact of it, without trying to change it.

Back to Jack...

Jack got the email from his boss.  He knows he has a meeting coming up.  He recognizes the concern he has for that and the impact it has on him.  He understands that it's really distracting him.  With his realization, he evaluates his day and decides that now is not the time to send an email to someone who might misinterpret it.   He also chooses not to start an entirely new project today when he can't fully focus. 

Jack enjoys his job and wants to do well, but he has no idea what to expect with the upcoming meeting.  By accepting his concern, he can choose how he will perform that day.  He can choose how he prepares for the meeting.  He can choose if he lets it bother him or not.  He knows he's doing a good job and doing the best that he can, so he's going to keep going about his normal tasks and routines and try to have the best meeting he can.  It doesn't remove the situation, but it relieves some of the stress for him.

In managing difficult emotions, first we need to identify.  After identifying the emotions, we need find a plan and address it.  If it's not something we can control, we can try utilizing coping skills.  In addition to this, acceptance is vital.  We need to recognize the emotions and their impact without trying to change anything.


Next week, we'll dive into how having a longer-term plan and knowing what our goals and values are can further help in managing difficult emotions.


The content above is based on the information provided from the youtube video by Robert Magill (see below); it has been edited and arranged by Joy Bundy.

]]>Fri, 18 Nov 2022 23:21:00 +0000<![CDATA[Dealing with Difficult Emotions, Part 2]]>https://www.magillcounseling.com/blogs/post/dealing-with-difficult-emotions-part-2In managing difficult emotions, first figure out what's bothering you. Find a plan. Use coping skills, and find acceptance. Lastly, look ahead to see if it can be prevented.]]>

Recently, Jack was feeling extra stressed after receiving an email from his boss requiring a meeting later in the day with no reason or explanation provided.


Jack examined his emotions to try to determine some of the "why" behind what he was feeling.


He figured out the reasons for some of his big emotions, but what should he do next?


Steps to Take after Identifying the Emotions...

ASK YOURSELF...
1) Is this something that I can control or do something about? 
If the answer is yes, then determine what it is you CAN do about it.  Then develop a plan and take care of it.  Most of the time, once the trigger is addressed, the emotions will dissipate.

If the answer is no, and this is NOT something within your control, then determine what can be done to mitigate the impact it has on you. 

Removing yourself from the situation entirely may be the best option.  Other times, a good strategy is utilizing coping skills.  These skills may look different based on the situation and environment.  Work coping skills may be different than skills used at home or while driving.  The important thing is to find something that you can do to help make the situation a little bit easier. Try calling a friend, going for a jog, or immersing yourself in a hobby.  Even taking a few minutes to slow down and take some deep breaths might be enough to shift your perspective.

2) How do I prevent this from happening again?

Back to Jack...

Jack figured out the "why" behind some of the big emotions he was experiencing.  While the upcoming meeting with his boss was NOT in his control, he chose to utilize some coping skills to lessen the impact of his emotions.  He focused in on his work tasks and other work interactions for the remainder of the day until the meeting time arrived.  He acknowledged his apprehension and anxiety, but after a few calming breaths and creating a plan for his work day, he tackled his tasks and re-directed his focus to the work in the moment and not the unknown in the future.


In managing difficult emotions, first figure out what's bothering you.  Next, find a plan and tackle it.  If it's not something within your control, utilize coping skills and find acceptance.  Lastly, look ahead to determine if there are steps that you can take to prevent a repeat situation in the future.

The content above is based on the information provided from the youtube video by Robert Magill (see below); it has been edited and arranged by Joy Bundy.

]]>Fri, 11 Nov 2022 14:00:01 +0000<![CDATA[Dealing with Difficult Emotions]]>https://www.magillcounseling.com/blogs/post/Difficult-EmotionsEmotions are an integral part of our everyday life. Becoming aware of the emotions and how they interact with our perceptions can lead us to healthy ways of navigating the difficult emotions we encounter.]]>

Jack was having a horrible day.  The moment he got to work, he saw an email from his boss indicating that they needed to have a talk, but no reason was provided.   Jack felt incredibly nervous.  The day continued to spiral downward from there with interactions with his co-workers, and he couldn't understand why.


He was dealing with some difficult emotions that clouded his perspective on everything else.

Dealing With Difficult Emotions...

What could help Jack with his emotions?
1) Recognize the emotion. 
What is he feeling, thinking, or experiencing that is getting in his way?  He was afraid of meeting with his boss.

2) Identify the cause. 
What is causing that emotion? Fear...but why?  Is he afraid of losing his job, getting transferred, maybe getting a promotion that he didn't want, or maybe he just wanted to avoid a potentially uncomfortable conversation.

3) Figure out what is in your control. 
What can he do about it?  CAN he even do anything about it? He can't change the meeting.  He can't change the topic.  Are there things that ARE in his control?

Back to Jack...

Jack got to work and got an email from his boss.  His boss wanted to meet later in the day. 

Jack realized he was afraid about the meeting because he didn't know what the meeting was about.  He also realized he couldn't control the meeting, but what he could do was make sure his performance is where it should be and that he has answers prepared for potential concerns his boss might bring up.  As far as his co-workers, no one else knew he was meeting with the boss later, so he decided to try to go about his day as if the meeting wasn't scheduled.  He needed to focus on his usual tasks until the meeting occurred. 



Emotions are an integral part of our everyday life.  Becoming aware of the emotions and how they interact with our perceptions can lead us to healthy ways of navigating the difficult emotions we encounter.

The content above is based on the information provided from the youtube video by Robert Magill (see below); it has been edited and arranged by Joy Bundy.

]]>Fri, 28 Oct 2022 16:43:02 +0000<![CDATA[Wisdom: What is it?]]>https://www.magillcounseling.com/blogs/post/What-is-WisdomWisdom is not just having knowledge. It allows us to utilize our resources effectively and focus on the most important elements of the situation in order to make the best decision we can in the moment.]]>

Jack is at work, and he is really frustrated.  He has all the information that he needs, and he knows how to do his job.  However, he is really struggling with implementing it.


He faces the same situation at home.  He knows what he needs to do and how to do it, but he's having a difficult time getting it done effectively. 


Jack has the knowledge that he needs, and he knows what to do, but Jack is struggling with wisdom.

What Is Wisdom?

So what is wisdom? 


First, let's take a look at what it is not.  It's not simply knowing something.  Wisdom goes beyond head knowledge and applies what we know in an effective way that cuts through the things that don't matter and aren't as important so that we can get to the underlying root of a problem and address that.


Wisdom can be both very practical and impractical.  It takes an ability to look beyond the surface and process what's underneath of whatever we're facing and to be able to understand that.  It also draws from the guidance and opinions of others whom we trust in our lives and gathering that information.  It is utilizing our resources effectively to make a the best decision we can.

Back to Jack

Jack is at work.  His boss gives him a new task.  Jack has information and knowledge, but now, he also has wisdom.  He understands that this task is important, but it may not be the most important task in this moment.  So he chooses to focus on what is most important at the time, and then later he can come back to the task that his boss just gave him.  He takes what he knows and what he needs to know for the task and cuts out anything extraneous so that he can focus effectively on completing that task and not get bogged down with too much information or bunny trails.  


At home, Jack understands everything that has to get done and why it's important so that he can prioritize when and what he has to do.  Because Jack understands the "why" behind it, he can triage his tasks effectively instead of getting burden or overwhelmed.   Similarly, with his wife, he understands what is important to her, as well as the "why," which helps him to be the best husband to her that he can be.


Wisdom allows him to understand what is needed of him in this moment and how to be able to effectively accomplish it, spending just the right amount of effort that the task should have.  Wisdom allows him to find the balance between completing what needs to be done effectively but not overdoing it so as to become overwhelmed and potentially burnout.



Wisdom is incredibly helpful because it takes what we know, cuts through things that aren't important, and it lets us make a quality decision based on what are the most important things for that situation.

The content above is based on the information provided from the youtube video by Robert Magill (see below); it has been edited and arranged by Joy Bundy.

]]>Fri, 13 May 2022 13:00:00 +0000<![CDATA[Meet the Therapist: Andrea Nuthak]]>https://www.magillcounseling.com/blogs/post/meet-the-therapist-andrea-nuthakAndrea's philosophy and approach to therapy is that the client is the expert of their experience, so her goal is to come along side the client and help process and work through difficult situations in life.]]>
"The client is the expert of their experience, and everyone's experience is valid." --Andrea Nuthak

Join us for a brief interview with our therapists Robert Magill and Andrea Nuthak!  The link to the entire interview is included below.  


Andrea is one of the master's level interns at Magill Counseling Associates.  She is completing her degree in clinical mental health counseling at Lancaster Bible College and is currently in her last year of her program.  Working at Magill Counseling Associates allows her to obtain some outpatient experience in the field. 


She is a board-certified music therapist and has worked with inpatient mental health clients utilizing this.  She is passionate about using music and the arts in her sessions. 


Andrea's philosophy and approach to therapy is that the client is the expert of their experience, so her goal is to come along side the client and help them process and work through the difficult situations in their life.

What Is Clinical Counseling?

Andrea shares that clinical mental health counseling is not about giving advice.  It is about helping people come to a realization about the strengths they already have within them and how to use that to work through their difficult situation.  She also points out that you don't have to wait for something to really be "wrong" to come to counseling.  Counseling is something that anyone can do at any time.     


Rob questioned Andrea regarding the difference between clinical counseling and marriage and family therapy.  Andrea explained how the clinical counseling focuses on the individual one-on-one counseling, whereas marriage and family is focuses on the couple or family dynamic of the relationship.

How Can Music Therapy Help?

Andrea explains some difference in music therapy, such as a passive experience, listening to a song, or a more active involvement, such as going through lyrics and identifying how it relates to what you're going through or how the emotions connect with your current situation.  Music can help the individual with the coping process.  In addition, there's the active music process, such as singing or playing an instrument or creating or writing music.


Andrea finds that the passive process is more accessible in sessions to pick apart lyrics or help clients identify with music passively than actively, while both are effective methods.

In closing, in her own words, Andrea shares, "I am really passionate about helping people find the best way for themselves and the genuine, authentic part of themselves that they know can help them get through some of these most difficult times."


Check out the complete interview below with Rob and Andrea!


]]>Fri, 22 Apr 2022 13:00:00 +0000<![CDATA[Criticism vs. Constructive Criticism]]>https://www.magillcounseling.com/blogs/post/Criticism-or-Constructive-CriticismCritical comments are always around us, but if we can learn to take the truth in the criticism and apply those changes for positive growth, that is something we can take control over!]]>

Jack was having a really rough day. 


He realized that his New Year's resolutions weren't happening.  He was getting some feedback from his friends and family that he just seemed to be slacking off on that.


Next, he had his annual review, and that didn't quite go as well as he was hoping it would.  It just felt like he was being criticized all the time, and he was getting really frustrated and upset. 


It started to feel like everything was against him.....


That’s because he was focusing on the criticism and not on allowing the criticism to be constructive criticism.


What's the Difference?

“One of the wonderful things is....we can pick out the truth even within the criticism and apply it....no matter how they meant it. THAT is something we have control over!"

Criticism can be used to cut down or hurt someone, especially if the person giving it is being very critical and isn't doing it to help but more to hurt.  Constructive criticism is cutting down whatever wasn't working before, but the difference is the motivation.  With constructive criticism, the intent is to build back up.  Criticism simply intends to knock down, whereas constructive criticism knocks down with the intent to remove what wasn't working with the goal to then build up something stronger in the end. 


One of the wonderful things about this, however, is that if something is criticism or constructive criticism, it doesn't matter what the intent of the other person is.  What matters is how we take that and what we do with it.  Even if someone is offering criticism because they're trying to hurt us, there might be some truth to that, and if we can pick out that truth and apply it to ourselves and make changes and reconstruct that part that they're criticizing, we take their spiteful and hurtful criticism, and we make that constructive criticism, and THAT is something we have control over!

Back to Jack...

Jack was having a rough day.   He was realizing his New Year's resolutions weren't working out.   


He was getting all sorts of feedback from his boss.  But he realizes his boss is giving him feedback. 


So Jack not only meets standards, but exceeds them.  And the feedback he's getting from family and friends is not necessarily to hurt him, but it's because they want him to do well; they notice he’s not hitting his own goals.


Jack was able to take a step back and listen to the feedback his boss was giving him; he made the changes, and three months later at that quarterly review, he did fantastic.  He was doing an excellent job because he took that information, broke down his poor work performance, and rebuilt it in a positive way.  He did the same thing with the feedback on his New Year's resolutions.  Even though it wasn't what he wanted to hear, he was able to take that and use it to build up where he was at and get right back on track so he could not only hit his New Year's resolutions but probably hit them early, as well.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Take Jack's approach and sift through the feedback and search for the truth in the midst of the critical comments.  Try to use that as a springboard for continued growth!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      


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